Shine
by icaughtfire
Summary: After Tara's death, Willow finds out the only one who understands her grief is in love with her. Dillow femslash. oneshot


**A/N: I've been wanting to write a Buffy fanfic for awhile, I just get so caught up in my other show...anyhow, recently I got into the Willow/Dawn shipper thing. A lot of people aren't into it cause they hate Dawn but I like it, and hope you do too!**

Willow felt dead inside.

She felt like she could never love again. Her soul mate was gone. Ripped from her.  
Fresh tears stung at her eyes. She'd already gone crazy and tried to destroy the world. Now was her time for mourning. So mourn, she did. Every day she visited Tara's grave, just to talk to her about everything. How much she missed her, how much she loved her, and how much she was hurting. She even started drinking. She hadn't drank in a long time. She drank just to numb the feelings. Sometimes, it seemed only one person could understand exactly how she was feeling. Dawn.

Dawn was the only one who understood how close Willow was with Tara. She herself was pretty tight with Tara, and the woman's death seemed to be killing her as well.

Willow sobbed. She took a drink of the beer in her hand, loving the feeling as it went down her throat. She was sitting on her bed. Their bed. Everything in that room reminded her of her love. She got up, picking up the mirror on the wall and throwing it to the floor. With a crash it fell, and broke into a million tiny pieces.  
Dawn came running, worry written all over her face. Her own eyes were puffy and her cheeks were tear-stained. She gazed at Willow and walked towards her, pulling her into a hug. They cried together for what seemed like hours.

Both girls were tired, and they sank into Willow's bed, looking at each other while they spoke of Tara, and told stories of her. Willow retold the story of how they first met. They talked about the day Dawn's mother died and how Tara had been such a help. They talked about what a beautiful person Tara was, and how much they hurt every day without her.

"You're the only one that's ever understood me," Dawn whispered, voice barely audible. "You've been like my best friend, Willow, for my entire life. And I'm so sorry you have to go through all this right now. Just know you don't have to go through it alone. I'll be here every step of the way, because I love you."

Willow smiled, a tear rolling down her cheek.  
"I love you, too." She leaned forward, planting a quick kiss on Dawn's cheek. "Thank you." She said quietly.  
Dawn thought nothing of it. She knew Willow was hurting. She didn't want to push anything. Deep down, she was in love with the redhead. But she couldn't tell her, especially not right now. She felt like she was betraying Tara's memory, and that made her feel guilty. So Dawn was silent.

It hurt Dawn so bad to see Willow like this. Wallowing in her sorrows. Drinking entirely too much, so she didn't have to feel the pain. But sometimes, Willow's reaction to the alcohol was quite the opposite. She seemed to spend day after day at the cemetary, and she could hear her tossing and turning at night. Willow never ate, and she rarely spoke to anyone but Dawn and Tara's grave.

But even though Willow was desperately depressed, it was still better than the surges of anger she used to have. When she almost destroyed the world. Dawn hated to think of that. Willow's anger had gotten the better of her. She'd actually KILLED a human being. That was all in the past now, and Willow swore she would never use magic again...

Tara was in heaven. She spent every minute of her day watching over Willow. It seemed her love was still in that painful place. She wanted more than anything to soothe her, to make all of her pain go away. But she couldn't.  
Tara pleaded with the gods to let her go down, to let her say goodbye to Willow. To talk with her. Surprisingly, they agreed. They said that Willow probably would never move on if she didn't. Tara knew that they were right. She knew that she had to repair her love. Make her okay again. She also knew that Dawn was in love with Willow, and she intended to make Willow see that.

All she wanted was for her to be happy.

Willow was sleeping, burrowed under the covers, when she heard someone singing. She thought it was her imagination, the sweet voice singing...

_**I'm still under your spell,**_

She continued to sleep, dreaming of her lost lover's face.

_**But now that I am gone, it is time for you to move on,**_

She rolled over to her other side, beginning to feel uncomfortable.

_**Though I love you, this is something you need to get through alone,**_

She sat up, seeing a glowing light above her head. And that light was Tara. She could feel it. She started crying, never taking her eyes off of the brilliant light above her.

"Tara! I knew you'd come! Tara, I love you baby...I miss you so, so much."  
Tara was sad. She floated at eye level with her once lover, seeing the hope in her eyes. She hated to crush the hope, but there was nothing she could do.

"I came to say goodbye, Willow. It's time for you to move on. You can't be like this forever. I'm gone, I'm really gone. And there's someone who loves you. She loves you so much, and you're so blinded by me that you don't even see it. Go to her. Be with her. I want you to be happy, Willow. Please."

Willow was confused. She didn't understand. Tara was coming from heaven to tell her goodbye, and to tell her to hurry up and move on? Not only that, but she was trying to get her together with someone else? That didn't seem right. No, it didn't. They were forever, and if they weren't together, she didn't want to be with anyone else! She was upset that Tara would ever even suggest it.

"How could you?" Willow accused angrily, hurt in her voice. "I love you, Tara. I can't just suddenly get over you and find some new girlfriend. I only want you. Forever you."  
Tara's voice turned cold. "You can't have me, and you can't get me back. You need to move on with your life. Dawn. She wants to be with you. Be with her."

Tara began to float away as Willow shouted for her not to leave. Tara felt guilty, and she felt horrible, but she knew that she had to. She didn't want to take that harsh tone with her one true love, but Tara knew that she was right. Willow couldn't be held back forever. She had a long life ahead of her, and she shouldn't spend it being upset.  
Tara returned back to her home in heaven, safely nestled in the clouds and watching Willow below her.

Willow knocked on Dawn's door loudly. Dawn opened it, rubbing her eyes. It was almost four in the morning, and she didn't understand why Willow was waking her up.  
She didn't have time to think as Willow captured her lips in a kiss. Then the redhead collapsed onto Dawn's bed, shaking with sobs.  
Dawn sat down beside of her, not understanding what was going on.

"Willow?"  
Willow lifted her head, gazing at the younger girl.  
"Tara said you're in love with me."

Dawn looked surprised, and embarrassed. "You...you talked to Tara? How? And why would she say something like that?"

"Are you?" Willow asked, still watching.  
"I..." Dawn couldn't find the words. She didn't want Willow to get upset. That was the last thing she wanted. Because if Willow got angry, she wasn't sure if the fiery redhead would ever forgive her.

"You are." Willow said quietly, burying her head in her hands. "I'm so stupid, I can't believe I didn't see it." She looked up, back at Dawn. "You don't want me. I'm broken. And I'm too old for you. You need someone who can make you happy."

"You do make me happy." Dawn argued, touching Willow's hand.

The redhead sighed, pulling the brunette into a hug. She was feeling defeated. She wasn't understanding anything in this night, and it was a big shock to her what Dawn had been feeling. She could only imagine how guilty the girl felt.

"Dawn, you don't know what you're saying."  
"Yes, I do. I love you." Dawn replied desperately, voice breaking.  
"No, you don't. You just think you love me. Dawn, I wouldn't be any good for you. I don't cause anything but hurt. You know that. Are you crazy?" Willow got up from the bed, pacing back and forth.

"Just crazy for you."

"Damnit. Shut UP, Dawn." Willow stopped, glaring at Dawn, but at the same time, feeling her heart flutter. She gazed at the girl and pulled her close, their lips joining in a frenzy of emotions.

And the lost girls weren't lost anymore.  
They had each other in the darkness of the night.


End file.
